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screen-saver.

something’s going on
and I don’t quite know what it is

 - but there’s an awful lot
of shitness on TV

sixty channels
and nothing to watch

 - like someone’s taking a dump
on your living room carpet
and making you pay for the privilege.

And it could well just be me,
but I really can’t stand
that one-eyed Pudsey Bear charity
crap & red-nose day bollocks
insinuating their guilt-trip blackmail
into my psyche
with a caring smile in one hand
and an 0845 cosh in the other

and Terry Wogan
under the spotlights
waving that stupid lollipop mike
& sweating like a box of
antediluvian dynamite
about to go pop.

well they can eff you see kay – off.
CGI celebrities, all of em.